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Category: CentOnion

CentOnion: Centre Students Melt As They Desperately Await A/C

Estimated Read Time: 3 minutes

by McKenzie Snellgrove With temperatures rising and the sun finally coming out to greet the smiling faces of students barreling headfirst into finals, spring has officially sprung here at Centre College! However, a strange epidemic seems to be emerging out of the beautiful weather. While most students can be found sunning themselves on the lawn […]

New Convocation Calendar

Estimated Read Time: 4 minutes

by Connor Park To: students-request@lists.centre.eduFrom: jayne.sharman@centre.edu Good morning, everyone! A number of revisions and additions to the Spring Term 2024 Convocation calendar have recently been made, reflected both on the document and in the descriptions below. These events can also now be found under the Convocations page on CentreNet. Mark your calendars for these upcoming […]

Feral Students Seen Crouching in Trees: Has Hazing Gone Too Far?

Estimated Read Time: 4 minutes

by McKenzie Snellgrove During the chaos following rush week, many Centre students have witnessed the effects of hazing taking hold of their affiliated friends. While hazing has been a long time tradition of college fraternities and sororities, some are starting to wonder if it has gone too far. In one recent testimony, a junior was […]

CentOnion: Milton Resigns! Centre Students Elect Blue Moreland As President

Estimated Read Time: 2 minutes

by Natalie Warren, Editor-in-Chief 2022-2023 In a sudden turn of events, Dean Goldey announced on Monday that President Milton has entered into an early retirement. The reasons he cited were 1) His budget had suffered significant cuts due to funds being funneled toward light pole replacement, 2) The stress of the clock tower project was […]

CentOnion: Sodexo To Add Pepto-Bismol Dispenser in Cowan

Estimated Read Time: 4 minutes

BY BRENNEN AMONETT – EDITOR-IN-CHIEF The Centre College dining scene is an ever-evolving culture. It is a foodie’s oasis in the sparse desert that is Danville, Kentucky. As of Monday, this only became more true. The college’s food provider, Sodexo – praised for its wide variety of healthy and flavorful options – installed a Pepto-Bismol […]

CentOnion: Master Plan Directors Announce Blueprints for Campus Parthenon

Estimated Read Time: 3 minutes

BY BRENNEN AMONETT – OPINIONS EDITOR The St. Louis-based architectural, planning and engineering firm, Hastings+Chivetta announced on Tuesday at a student forum the first campus improvement in the development of Centre College’s new master plan. A LEED Certified Parthenon will soon be an aesthetic fixture on campus with plans to complete the structure by the […]

CentOnion: Centre College President Shocked To Hear Not Everyone Enjoys Emojis

Estimated Read Time: 5 minutes

BY: BRENNEN AMONETT – STAFF WRITER In an astonishing wave of electronic critique, students, faculty, and alumni of Centre College have banded together to oppose President John A. Roush’s horrifying use of emoticons in emails and posts on the college’s Facebook page. In an email addressed to the student body last Wednesday, President Roush addressed […]

CentOnion: DPS Opens Investigation into Centre Student’s Email Account

Estimated Read Time: 5 minutes
Google Images Fair Use

BY: BRENNEN AMONETT – STAFF WRITER The Department of Public Safety (DPS) has opened an investigation into first-year student Hope Carter’s controversial use of the ‘reply all’ button on a school-wide email. In a letter written to the Centre College Board of Trustees on Friday, Director of Public Safety Kevin Milby noted that “The use […]

CentOnion: Centre to Host 2016 Vice Presidential Cage Brawl

Estimated Read Time: 5 minutes

BY BRENNEN AMONETT – STAFF WRITER The Commission on Presidential Debates (CPD) revealed a new partnership with World Wrestling Entertainment (WWE) today, announcing the first ever Vice Presidential Fight-to-the-Death Cage Brawl. This event is set to take place at Centre College on October 13th, 2016, and will be the fourth of now five general election […]

CentOnion: Cowan’s Meaty Monotony

Estimated Read Time: 4 minutes
Google Images Fair Use

BY JAKE MCGUIRK – STAFF WRITER Far more important than newly tenured faculty, a rapidly growing student body, a presidential election, or an ever-heightening conflict in the Middle East is this pressing question: what food will we get to shove in our mouths today? There’s no doubt about it; no single topic dominates conversation at […]

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