by Aelwen Iredale
There’s been rain. There’s been sun. There’s been every temperature we can imagine. And guess what? It’s not over with! We can all be very excited to deal with continually varying temperatures. So don’t put away your winter boots just yet—spring hasn’t sprung quite yet.
Here’s the weather report for this week:
Thursday, April 2nd:
Highs of 20, lows of 10. 5 inches of snow expected.
Friday, April 3rd:
Highs of 73, lows of 24. No, these temperatures won’t steadily increase throughout the day. The high is at exactly 2:13pm, and all other times of day are 20 degrees.
Saturday, April 4th:
Highs of 100, lows of 99. Warning: dry, brittle grass can catch fire more easily than normal. (Tired students also catch on fire more easily)
Sunday, April 5th:
Highs of 31, lows of 25. A storm will be passing through, and lightning is attracted to struggling students. Coincidentally, these temperatures also represent the best score you’ll get on your next exam!
Monday, April 6th:
Highs of 65, lows of 59. Somehow, there will be 4 inches of snow, which will melt and flood every laundry room on campus.
Tuesday, April 7th:
Highs of 89, lows of 91. How is the low warmer than the high? Figure it out, you’re a Centre student.
Wednesday, April 8th:
Highs of 120, lows of 100. Time for you to melt since the air conditioning won’t be on yet.