By Linley Mueller and McKenzie Snellgrove
When you walk into a frat party, what’s the first thing you see? For me, I see my friends! Of course, parties are also the place to pick up women! But, how do you get a woman to notice you? It’s hard to not be nervous, and we understand. So… when you walk into the next frat and see a beauticious woman grinding on the floor, we’ll make sure that you know how to handle all that–The CENTO way. We have put into place a system in which you are guaranteed to get the attention of the girl of your dreams. Remember the acronym, C.E.N.T.O., is the way we organize the system, seen here:
C– Control the dance floor! Flail your arms, spin around wildly, sing along at the top of your voice. Never forget the importance of gyration. Your hips tell a story. Show that you are an alpha and soon the girls will be flocking to dance with you. Once you make eye contact with a beautiful lady on the dance floor, it is on. Lock eyes and make sure she knows that she’s the only one for you. Suggest this by perhaps wiggling your eyebrows in a suggestive manner or waving your tongue in a “come here” motion.😜 Your charms will make you irresistible to her.
E– Entice her. Tell her all of your unique assets as a potential boo. Maybe you’ve still got 500 flex dollars left to spend or you live in a quiet and spacious Brock with an up-to-date AC. You could tell her that you will always bring her flowers in the morning, along with a shining compliment. Remember, it doesn’t have to be true as long as it is enticing! Demonstrate to her that you are a provider and will never abandon her in her time of need. Once you have done this, she will feel safe around your strong aura and begin to let her guard down…🐺
N– Never interrupt her. Listen to women’s voices, they have something to say!! (They always have something to say…🙄) You could learn a thing or two! Listen to her as she talks about the beautiful flowers she has seen growing on the tree outside the library or the cute dog she saw walking around campus. Although likely she will be talking about how much she loves the song that’s playing. Make sure to nod your head so she knows you’re paying attention (even if you aren’t).
T– Tiptoe off. Tell her you have to go to the bathroom when you are at a stopping point in the conversation. This will lead her to believe that you are mysterious and that you may be a very sociable person. It is always good to look like you know your way around the party. Once you are sure you are alone, it is imperative that you throw up. Get rid of all your nerves (that do not exist of course because you are an alpha). Pull out your breath spray and empty it into your mouth, that way you are maximum fresh. Then smooth out your hair with your 50s era grease comb to get that slicked back vibe that makes the girls swoon. Once you are ready, return to the function and get your groove on.
O– Offer her your hand. If she accepts, you’re in! Dance and make sure to request the songs you want to listen to. Also, when she accepts your hand, it is okay to ask if she will be your girlfriend. Make sure to be confident and kind! There will be different ways to pick up girls, but these are guaranteed to guide you to this stage of the courting process. If a girl offers her hand back, make sure to let her know you are committed to her. Get a tattoo of her name on your forehead as a sign of fidelity and longevity in the relationship. Also, while you’re dancing, make sure to rub some of your pheromones onto her to mark your territory. When she inevitably is approached by someone else, they will know that you and her have a bond they cannot even begin to comprehend and will back off.
Treasure your youth. When you go to your next frat party, remember that you are not alone. We are also there! …and watching… Good luck!
~ People who love women